but above all things truth beareth away the victory

Speak through the heat, haze and hubris
Sound just one word
Food for a wayward journeyer
Caught
Upon foreign planes
Within distant memories

I couldn't tell you why I went outwardly so far
When inwardly there was only one spot to stand upon
And weep
To remain so still within yet be moving and moving
Across fields and cities in sunshine, snow and rain
Tell me why I did not wait for the early morning dew?

Moments came and went
Fleeting little things so briefly alighting
I couldn't ever catch one
Not even once
But how, how could it be
With my candle and my cross and a bleeding heart
Could I ever be imprinted with evening song?

Definition enough, enough now
For a moment falls from the sky
Like a falling star
Full of death, full of belonging, full of fire
Tell me, how could it be that I should make
Such a trilogy a part of me?

Light wards was not above but within
Emanating from a pierced heart
And a translucent side
Rough wood catches me most nights
Between majesty and awakening
Beholding and flowering

And Beauty
Is asking
To be seen
Asking to be
Taken inside
And wholly loved

everything depends upon the rain

everything depends upon the rain
rushing, pouring, trickling, spitting
down, down
everything depends upon the soft drops
pentrating hard earth
finding the roots

everything depends upon standing outside
in the downpour
being soaked to the skin
and within
a deep well bubbles up
and laughs

everthing scorched
everything bitten by dust
everything withered
and dried up
soaked, soaked

everything depends upon the rain
the rain, rain
falling down, falling fast
falling between us
and within our hearts

Who? Where? When? Why? What?

The Singer's song untaught,
unuttered, unknown
by so many
yet deeply understood
by naked humankind
is the mystery of the Word
laid bare ...

Shame-filled fingers tremble.
Lips move.
The beginning of prayer
is mourning over
uttered sin.

Stricken nights fall away,
and dew-filled mornings sweep away
dawn's doubts.

Who calls?
Where is the hand to hold me?
When will the students of destruction
be stopped?
Why can't I find him who my soul loves?
What covers me?

Hiding the gift from the giver;
Giving the gift like it's mine -
what folly.

Who is rising?
Where have I fallen?
When do I arrive?
Why have you gone?
What comes?

Can I hold your gaze for a lifetime?
Face to face
in shallow waters and in the depths.
In nothing and in everything.
In vulnerability and in strength.

What is it I want?
What is my choice?

My will is a knife to pierce
the membrane of fate,
and turn the world on it's edge.

And turn me to face the Beloved
and not look down; not ever.
To grasp the hand of
faith and hope,

and live.

No Room

The house is full
The door shut
Under lock and key
To keep in the old
Exclude the new
Ban possibility

Pale light smoulders
Shadows lengthen
No invite
But a star is high
And a way unfolds
Drive on dark night

No room
No welcome
Such a long ride
House shut
Door filled in
Baby is born this cold eve

Outside

the centre of sorrow

ripples on a surface expanding
the edge not seen
a stone dropped from a great height
the depth not fathomed

plummeting pebble of yesterday
sinking still
seeking the centre of sorrow
falling, falling

through all those soundless places
o if i could see
if i could know
if i could grasp

the pierced hand
delving to catch
this weighted
pain-filled thing

and swallow it down
drowning the swathes
of darkness
that fostered such a child

and there it is
transfigured and blessed
body containing sorrow's centre
how could you injest this most bitter pill

and not die again?
once and for all
a heart beat ceases
blood and water flows

forgive me
if i cannot stand
on the banks
of fathomless love

where there' s no edge
no bottom
no end
to be swept where by the tide?

but encompassed
i would
be truly
forever yours x

I have proclaimed truth's river but have not always been able to swim in it

I tried to hear the voice of love in the midst of the world's empty spinning.
I tried to listen to the only one who can save - the only one mighty enough to deliver from deep darkness.
God of heaven came down and walked through the haze of sinfulness,
The cloud of sorrowfulness, upon the shards of forgetfulness, and reached the edges of me.
Some will call, open-handed, shame-faced, contrite, whilst others will remain tight shut.
Those who do not open their eyes unto vain shallow tidings and cover themselves with truthful writings - they are the ones who will be blessed!
The Lord has taken the beating, the whipping, the driving pain of nails through flesh and bone.
He does not need silence, empty chatter or pretense.
He does not need the deep shaft of injustice reaching down into his earth.
I say, "When will the dark corners be exposed by the ruthless search-light from on high?
So many cowering figures to unfold, and my heart's story yet to be told."
I have proclaimed truth's river but have not always been able to swim in it.
Lord, will you not destroy the giants of corruption tramping through the mazes of indifference?
Concrete and steel columns that seem immovable will crack from within and crumble upon the heads of the poor.
Swirling patches of darkness, like typhoons will rush down and catch men up, along with the things that they have made.
And I remain fixed in a closed space surveying my hands and the landscape for new signs of life.
Lord, there is enemy who comes only to rob, kill and destroy.
Broken vessels strewn the earth.
Lord, when will you lead the heavenly host out?
When will the gate swing wide and prosperity shout?
Lord, you stand on the edge of victory's dawn, as so many hearts are failing.
My eyes are dimming.
The ravages of sin have made so much of the earth uninhabitable.
Yet it is still lived in.
Lord of hosts, this is your home.

(based on Psalm 40, written using the Psalm Readings technique)

Cool of the Day

I didn’t know where you were,
So suddenly departed from your routine.
Was it always in your mind
To wander so far from our meeting place?
I didn’t know what to do.
How long was I to wait?
What was I to think?
I thought our love was real.
Strolling through leafy garden glades,
Smiling and talking, gazing upon bounty’s home.

Why did you hide when you heard my footsteps
Approaching amid the rustling branches?
The leaves you covered yourself with are withering.
My darling, when the sun goes down
You will not be able to find your way home.
All this beauty now casts a shadow.
I am fading from your memory,
And soon you will no longer know who you are.
Fading light touches my face tonight,
The first of many evenings in alone.

But before you go take these clothes,
Sewn from skins that speak of a sacrifice
Many years from now.
A sign, my dearest love,
Of how I would allow myself to be hunted down.
When you stepped out from behind that tree
I knew I would hang on another
In the cool of a different day,
Through the longest of nights.
But, right now, I don’t want you to be cold.

WINTERVAL

It’s so cold here in Winterval.
Shop lights glow revealing treasures within,
Calling across empty hearts where sorrow hides.
‘There’s more, always more.
Come inside.’

It’s so silent here in Winterval.
Like the little match girl freezing in the last flicker of dawn
We wait to be found.
No star in the night, no chorus of angels,
No word spoken, no not a sound.

It’s so dark here in Winterval.
They took down every sign.
No welcoming inn to rest a while, no sweet wine to savour.
Made like barren women, never to give birth, always to strive,
Like men, forever to journey, but never to arrive.

It’s so sad here in Winterval.
With no reason to give gifts
We lie wrapped in a joyless world, so meek, so mild.
Nothing to remember, no story to tell.
No Christ to worship and adore, just an inner child.

Pure Steel

The flashing blade
Will blind the enemy's eye
For a moment in time

The advantage gained
Sure-footed on the Rock
With a firm grip

Thrust forward the Spirit's sword
The pure steel will not fail
Jesus is Lord

Form-ed

From what was I made?
Dark longing of man
Full-orbed hope of woman
Met in yesterday's pool
Where passion rose
And thought descended
Into the deepest depths

From where did I come?
Above, below, within
Womb within a womb
Travelling, entering, confined
Suspended within the walls
Of blind time

What does this mean?
Fallen between
Male and female
Near or thrown far
Distance measuring existence
Beyond maker, creator

Where will I go?
Breath before death
Blame before shame
Brother against brother
A flood, an ark
A flaming sword piercing
Between the light and dark